Mike’s Manifesto (And a request for ideas)

Since my days, nights, weekends, and even sleep are filled with trying to find employment, and in the spirit of advertising myself, I offer another look at the things I can (and have) done in my life. This is long, boring, and all about ME. It does have a purpose though. Since, in over a year and a half, I have not found someone to offer me a job, (Or even give me a chance to show how I might help) I am looking for suggestions on how I can create one for myself. I can think of lots I could do. I just can’t figure out how to monetize them. And, right now, that is a key parameter. I apologize in advance for the lack of a plot, and the reliance on a sole character – me. I shall call it my Manifesto. It is what I believe. That I should be a productive, income producing, member of society once again. Please help me realize that dream.

What I am doing is asking for help. No, not money, but help formulating ideas on what I can do, on my own, to support our enterprise while it still exists. While I am not in the least giving up my daily routine of looking for jobs, applying for jobs, reading, writing, and networking in search of jobs, and thinking about how to find jobs from sunrise till sunset, none of that seems to be generating much in the way of job possibilities. What follows is a lot about me. I am over humility, and I am no longer bashful about telling people what I can, and cannot do. I have a lot of talents, in many, diverse areas. For a large part this has hindered my job search. I find it hard to “define myself”. So much for all those ads to learn a new skill. So much for applying a personal talent to a new field or career. That is, in Sherman Potter’s vernacular, horsehockey.

The sad fact is that technology jobs do not exist in Central Ohio. The few that do appear are given to younger, & cheaper people than me. A college degree is mandatory, whether it is germane or not, and some kind of certification on the particular little niche they are trying to fill is required. I would have to have a different certification for every single job I apply for – including McDonalds. Experience, or the ability to actually do the work is secondary. And forget about hiring someone that might need a week or two to learn the new syntax for their Whiz-Bang x2000 production platform. So what if you could do it much better than the guy with the x2000 cert (who has never actually seen an x2000 anyhow). We won’t even touch on the work ethic, the not invented here syndrome, or the ‘need’ to teach an old dog a new culture. No, what few technology positions exist are very specific, and my demographics leave me flapping in the breeze.

So, I need ideas. Ideas on what I can do, by myself, to, as they say, generate income. And, I don’t mean MLM, work at home scams, $2.00/hr filling out surveys, or going to Bernie Madoff university for a refresher course.

First, here is a little (OK, a lot) about what I can do. Some may not be pertinent, but. One thing I have gotten from this job search, I am no longer shy and retiring about my abilities…. (so please forgive me while I ‘honk my own horn’, toot my tweeter, tweet on tooter, ramble on, whatever).

If it is mechanical, electrical, or electronic, I know how it works. I know how to repair, maintain, and modify it. I also can, within reason, design and/or build it. I have a unique and well developed gift to understand how technology, and technical things, work. I also have a gift that allows me to focus on something technical, quickly understand it in depth, and become quite proficient in it. I have had to do this routinely during my time at AP, as technology, and the vast array of things we supported, changed. I am very good at it.

I am a capable programmer, both applications and web. I am quite good at embedded controls, as well as creating the software for them. I am also a competent web developer. Unfortunately, I have not paid much attention to .NET, and I do ASP, not PHP (Of course I could learn pretty damn quick). I also know SQL and databases. Let me digress a moment…

I love information and I have been fascinated by databases since day one. I have done college courses in database design. I have taught database design. I suggested and created the first TWO database systems for AP to track their equipment and customers (all 10,000 customers and 750,000+ pieces of equipment). The first one in assembler – under DOS. The second using Clipper and xbase (37,000 lines of code – a major app for it’s day). I also was heavily involved in modifying and implementing the AP’s first commercial software – fieldwatch. I have done a lot of web development with SQL, ASP and ODBC – some with Oracle databases, some with Access. I have created more reports than should be allowed to exist, including with Crystal reports. Well, I have applied for numerous openings for database designers, maintainers, administrators and managers. I don’t even get considered – read not even interviewed – for the jobs. Why? Because I am not ‘Certified’. Anyway.

I am a quite accomplished mechanic. I know cars and car repair. Including and especially the electrical, electronic and computer control systems that make modern ones function. I understand much of the engineering that is involved in car design.

I know how houses are built, and I am a quite competent carpenter, woodworker and cabinet maker. I can also do all the plumbing, electrical and HVAC – properly, and with better workmanship than most I have seen who are licensed. I have had a major hand in building or heavily remodeling maybe two dozen houses in my life, and helped with many, many, more.

In short, I can competently build most things, and fix damned near anything. I am especially good at figuring out and fixing oddball one-of a kind items and systems. I have a very good sense of aesthetics. I can create web sites, and connect them to the back end data. I think I am good at user interface design, such as web pages. I am one of the best wiring installers on the planet (it is an art), and my workmanship in anything is second to none. If you are going to bother doing something – do it right. Of course, my field is IT, and I am perfectly competent with computers, networking, and all that jazz. Also, I have spent my life in field service, I know that arena very well from every aspect – from managing it to running the road. I recently worked for one (unnamed) company that could desperately use my help… I am also quite adept at documentation, both creating it, and organizing it. Fact is, I can quite well organize anything except a church social. Finally, of course, I absolutely adore most kinds of animals, and I am told I am sort of good with them.

I can, and would like to, educate. Pass on the knowledge and skills, show people how, and explain how the world works. Science, Physics, how airplanes fly, and rockets rocket. How a car works, and how to make it work, how to fix a television, computer, air conditioner or weapons control system. I must digress once more….

I want to teach. Technical things. I want to do my part to get our country back out of the technical mediocrity and apathy we have found ourselves in. I have applied to most of the technical and vocational schools in this area – both for posted jobs, and cold calling. I have spoken to many of them. They will not consider me. It is not my experience or knowledge, indeed they tell me that is not nears as important as – the mandatory 4 year degree, preferably, not in the field you wish to teach, but in education. A carpenter with a four year college education and six months experience is qualified to teach carpentry. Someone with 35 years experience and no degree is not. This strikes me as wrong. This strikes me as one reason for American society’s growing technical ineptitude. Our society is becoming dependent on machines and technology that few really understand. The average American hasn’t a clue how even their car works. That is bad. Don’t make me cite Star Trek Episodes…….

So, why can’t I get a friggin job? What am I missing?

A few more things I can do…. I know a bit about Pro-Audio and lighting, I play several musical instruments including keyboards and guitar (doesn’t everyone?). Naturally, I know a whole lot about publishing and pre-press, and I happen to be a ‘certified’ locksmith. Oh, certifications, one more digression, I promise, just one more.

Certifications, I never thought much about certifications, never needed them. I also don’t ‘take tests’ very well. I tend to not read the question before selcting the answer. Of course now, certs have supplanted ability, talent, skills, knowledge and experience, as the primary qualifier for employment. And  now, I can’t even afford to pay for the tests. A while back I did spend a couple of days pursuing a few, since the AP was paying. I managed to get the CompTia A+, Network+, Security+ and Server+ one day. A couple of days later I added an MCP in Server 2000 (Quite a joke). I signed up with TechSkills last year for a CCNA. Naturally, I ran out of time (I had a good reason) with about two days left to complete that course. I did get a really nice $2500.00 CCNA book out of it though. I have taken, and passed, most of the free tests on Brainbench. I have also, in the last couple of years, taken a lot of practice tests, and passed them in such diverse things as all the ASE Automotive exams, and the prep for electrical and plumbing, and Air Conditioning licenses. I even passed a practice exam for the written part of a pilots license (OK, I cheated a bit on that one). While at Techskills, I tried a number of their ‘test preps’ one day and passed many of them for things such as Access, MS Project , and various others I can’t remember (no, I flunked medical transcriptionist).

Of course, there are a few things I can’t do. Here are the big restrictions on my ability to contribute.
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I can’t sing. (But, I can ballroom dance). Neither am I a mathematical prodigy. Now, I am quite good with numbers, and I can be a useful accountant (I did it for 15 years for the Condos). I can use and understand the formulas necessary for say, electronics design, and I understand what the math is describing – (I have a pretty good handle on things such as physics and aerodynamics). But, my math skills stop, cold, at Calculus. I had to learn algebra to graduate High School, and I had to learn Trig to do what I did in the Navy, but, that is it. Nothing forced me to learn higher math, so I didn’t. Call me empirical, not theoretical. Thomas Edison, not Steven Hawking.

I am not an artist. (Damn it Jim, I’m an engineer, not an artist). While what I do is obsessively neat, and aesthetically correct, I can not draw freehand worth a damn. I am very creative technically, and I can color within the lines – just barely. But, I can’t draw that picture on the comic book page to save my life. Aw well. So, the artsy, crafty type stuff is out. Albeit though, being an engineer, I am a rather good draftsperson (both with Cad, and with the ol’ reliable. More fun, drafting board). My dad taught drafting, maybe that is why?

Although I have helped build many race cars, I am not a fabricator in the current vernacular. In particular I do not weld. Given the status of my heart, I try to avoid touching wires that have large amounts of electricity flowing through them. I can make and design structures out of metal, and I can use most of the tools. I understand mechanical engineering and I do know quite a bit about hardware, fasteners and aircraft construction (Airplanes are mostly bolted together). I also know how to operate a milling machine and lathe, but I am not a machinist. I am very good at constructing control panels, robot parts, small enclosures, and the like.

I don’t know much about biology. Likewise. about all I know of chemistry is that gas and oil don’t mix, and if they have tried to, something needs fixed. I do know how a refinery works. Extra credit?

I do have a few assets left that have not gone to the god of Ebay.

First, there is money. I still have two coffee cans full of pennies. That works out to about $26.00, less the cost of wrappers.

I have a well equipped shop. I am equipped for electronics about on a level with an average industrial lab – albeit one from the eighties. I have an extensive collection of tools, including specialty and automotive, most necessary woodworking equipment, and the ability to measure and test just about anything. I am equipped to do mechanical repair and light mechanical fabrication, as well as any type of electrical/electronic repair. (at least that which is possible).

I have a perfectly good technically oriented website (http://mccworkshop.com), that at one time, before I abandoned maintaining it, had a rapidly growing following and a very good search engine ranking. I am currently using Google ads, and I have a merchant account with paypal. I also have a well respected and rated ebay sellers account. I know quite well how to market on the internet, and I am quite knowledgeable about SEO – including the ‘bad’ stuff. I just have nothing to market. I even have a registered business name – MCC Electronics.

My main problem over the years with entpreneurship, and I have tried, believe me, is charging people money for services. I just can’t seem to do it, and if I do, it just covers expenses – maybe. I can sell stuff, well, let’s say I can accept money for things. I just can’t manage to charge for my services. If I had something to sell, if I could find a way to make my web site generate income, if I could contract project work, if I could find something compelling to build, repair or modify.

So, there you have it. Certainly there is something that I can do to generate some money. I just cannot think of what it is. I may be jaded at this point. I may be depressed. I may just have too much on my plate right now to think clearly. I don’t know, but I am drawing a blank. I do know we are tired of just existing, and that we are going into the dumper REALLY fast. Even if I find that job right now, I am afraid it will be too little, too late. Actually, I used to complain that I was tired of ‘just existing’, now, that would actually be a step up. I will opine that it is hard to find creative ways to win the race, when you are so consumed with just staying in it. But, I am not here to make excuses. I am here to ask friends, colleagues, acquaintances, strangers, anyone who has ideas, please send them to me. One just might strike the right chord, and my new song will start writing itself.

If you can stand it, there is even more on my professional profile page: http://mccworkshop.com/62095/70330.htm

And, even more in my LinkedIn profile: http://www.linkedin.com/in/michaelcorder

And, finally, No. I’ll never get over Mucho Grande.

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